According to our expert in Ariesology, you will have a "fluffy" month, even though I have no idea what that means. Our expert also says that the Wool Cushion she created wasn't done so Lucy and Michelle could be saves, but it was because she wanted to share it with you. Yes, you. She says that she is waiting for you for "Fluffy Time". Wait. Now I know what she means. *nosebleed*
TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)
It seems that your Taurus-like personality has made you ill-tempered lately. People around you might have been expecting a bit more cooperation on your part and you could be nicer and more concerned about their needs. Of course, to change that attitude of yours, you just need to relax and let all the stress out by masturbating at Lucy's body. That always helps this guy at least...
GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
Nothing much is happening this month, yet you seem worried and tense. It's because this month you will meet your evil twin. We all have one, we just don't know them, but this month my dear Gemini, you will encounter your own. Be prepared. Your evil twin will try to destroy you, either mentally, emotionally or socially. You can't let them. You have to fight back or you will regret it. Now listen to the greates battle music of all time (video to your right) and get ready to fight!
CANCER (June 21 -July 22)
You often need to release your personal emotions. This month will be no exception to the rule as you will be a complete drama queen like this guy. You will do anything, make up lies, cheat, steal, kill, anything to get what you want, just like this guy. You won't care who you step on, who you hurt, how many lives you'll destroy to get what you want, just like this guy. I feel sorry for you. Go get a haircut like this and pray that you don't turn out like this guy.
LEO (July 23 - August 22)
You shouldn't try to fight the feelings that run through you this month. Don't even try to rationalize them. These feelings are connected to your perverted nature and your constant wanting to have pleasure. Don't fight it, just give in. However, don't go around looking for a whore, look for that special someone. That special someone is the only one that can fulfill you my perverted Leo. Your welcome.
VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)
You'll be lost in your thoughts this month, analyzing your life. You'll be asking yourself what kind of things are chaining you down from doing what you want. Is it your work? Is it school? Is it responsibilities at home? Is it responsibilities at the Fairy Tail Wiki? Is it your homosexuality? Is it your addiction to Wikis? Is it because you killed Natsu after getting raped by Bacchus and Ichiya? Well no matter what is chaining you down, know that you can just let go of those chains by getting some sweet deserved punishment, right Virgo?
LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)
This will be a very busy month for you Libra. You will be filled with so much work that you are barely going to have time to catch any sleep. This is dangerous to your relationships. Don't let all of your responsibilities become your entire world. Take some time out to spend with my family and friends as to not lose them. Don't go to the other extreme either and neglect your responsibilities. Balance everything out like this girl can. She balances her leisure time with her work time. We have a lot to learn from spirits.
SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)
We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! We are! Yeah! That's your horoscope. Have fun!
For the best spirit ever, you will succeed this month like never before. You'll get everything your heart desires. You want money? You'll get it! You want love? You'll feel like a whore with so much of it going around! You want fame? It's yours! That's what all Capricorns deserve ^_^
AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)
This month a strong sense of destiny could lead you to someone new - either a potential close friend or prospective romantic partner. You're apt to feel especially protective toward this person, Aquarius, and even though he or she is new to you. You could feel as if you've known this person forever. Expect to shine and be overjoyed! Enjoy your month and call me if you ever need some "special time". I'll be waiting. *perv mode on*
PISCES (February 19 - March 20)
Volatile emotions may come to the surface among the members of your household this month. This could prove irritating for you, Pisces, but try to avoid becoming involved in others' quarrels. At times like this, a lot could be said that shouldn't be said, and apologies won't necessarily wipe it out. This is a great month to get some work done around the house, as your physical energy is high. Make use of your good aesthetic sense and your black and whiten fishes.