Template:Jakuho's Corner/April 2013

 <div style="float:right; width:46%; height:380px; border:3px solid #000000; background-color:gold; color:#ffffff; -moz-border-radius:3ex; border-radius:3ex; background-image:-moz-linear-gradient(top, orange 25%, gold 75%); background-image:-webkit-gradient(linear, 0% 100%, 0% 0%, color-stop(75%, gold), color-stop(10%, orange)); -moz-box-shadow: 0 0 10px 3px #000000; -webkit-box-shadow: 0 0 10px 3px #000000; box-shadow: 0 0 10px 3px #000000; padding:10px; padding-bottom:15px; background-color:gold; text-align:center;"> IamJakuhoRaikoben is the founder of Jakuho's Corner, as well as its sole editor. His goal in its founding was to keep editors and viewers of the Fairy Tail Wiki informed on the latest rumors, gossip, and facts about the Fairy Tail Series.  Welcome to "Jakuho's Corner", your source for Fairy Tail rumors, chapter info, interviews, and more!  Note: The rumors this month are stale, meaning there are no new rumors this month. Do not assume the following are definitely true. These are all rumors that I got from one of my many sources:

Stale Rumors >>>  '''Hello everyone! Today we will be interviewing one of the most woman-respecting perverts on the site, ! Fairy Tail Wiki: Tell us a little about yourself.

Monkey.D.Me: (Looking at the sky and spacing out.) The clouds are so nice today..

Fairy Tail Wiki: Pay attention to the questions whore (ಠ_ಠ)

Monkey.D.Me: About myself? Hmmm .. Let’s see. My name is Monkey.D.Me.. People who hate me from very depth of their hearts call me MDM. Girls who dream about me every night call me Honey, Sweetie, Hot Stuff, Hotrod and ect ect ..

Fairy Tail Wiki: Move the fuck on (ಠ_ಠ)

Monkey.D.Me: Well I was born in India, the land of exotic food and million gods. Later I moved to Canada to receive better education thou it was a down-right mistake >_> so I did my High School here in Canada and now I am doing Mechanical Engineering Design and Drafting in college. OH, and I am handsome macho man with Heavenly Body that surpasses Jellal’s ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ

YumYum: NO YOU DON’T WHORE! (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡︵(\ .o.)\

Monkey.D.Me: Haters Gonna Hate >_> (Starts reading from a paper) Well I am medium-build young-adult with black hair, black eyes and light-tanned skin. I am helpful, stubborn and loving at the same time. I am active member on One Piece wiki as well as Fairy Tail wiki. Anything else?

Fairy Tail Wiki: How did you first discover the Fairy Tail Wiki?

Monkey.D.Me: Truth or should I let my Imagination run wild?

Fairy Tail Wiki: Truth (ಠ_ಠ)

Monkey.D.Me: Well, as I said I was active member on One Piece wiki. Nico Robin was one of my favourite female character and in recent data book they published her measurements.. And around same time I started reading Fairy tail and Erza also became my favourite female character. SO, I was curious to see whose measurements are bigger, better and curvier than other ^_^ so I searched and the link took me to Erza’s page on this wiki. Later I saw a familiar face in the “Chat List” whom was Iamhungry4444 =_= so I joined the chat and.. I WAS HOOKED!! I love you guys, FREE HUG AND KISSES! (づ￣ ³￣)づ

Mega: Take one step forward and I ban you (ಠ_ಠ)

Fairy Tail Wiki: What 5 tips would you give new users on the wiki?

Monkey.D.Me: 5 Tips.. hmmm

•	Don’t mistake wiki life with your real life. While wiki life is indeed your getaway from the stress and bullshit of reality ( _ _) it can’t be ignored or avoided. Face the troubles that you are having in your lives. Learn to stand up if you are hurt. Try again if you have failed. Apologize if you have made a mistake. Help others if care for each-other. Remember, wiki is not the one giving your school Report Cards or Giving you allowance for lunch money. Its your parents and school. So treasure the reality and if you ever need help or support, then looks back and we all your wiki-family will be there to support you. Thats what friends are for, thats what wiki is for and thats what makes us a perfect community ^_^

•	Respect women which include treating them with care and love. This does not just apply to your Wiki-Gf or girl you have crush on.. its for your Mother, your Sister or even that annoying girl that keep asking you to add her to your facebook. Every woman deserves the every ounce of respect and love this world has to offer. (pervy face) some more than other~

•	MY LOVELY BELOVED LADIES AND REST OF YOU SHITTY GUYS, be sure to know the difference between illusion and reality. I am sure you all are aware and know the difference but just felt like reminding that imaginary characters of manga can’t compared with the real people. While fangirling and fanboying is just means to express your attachment to the character, be sure to not hurt someone’s feelings over a character that is mere illusion. Remember, for “feelings” to exist.. there needs to be existence of “feel”.

•	OK, serious shit aside .. stay away from following female members .. Jess, Niji and Chaos ^_^ simply put, they are my “targets” ;)

•	Hmmmm also, stay away from following people.. Rem, Mega, IH and Rai .. >_> for your own safety. Don’t say later that I didn’t warn you =_=

Fairy Tail Wiki: And, for once I thought you were serious about something..

Monkey.D.Me: (picking his nose while spacing out) Serious what?

Fairy Tail Wiki: Why do you create such random blogs?

Monkey.D.Me: Is that a compliment or flat-out insult? Well anyways, making blogs has been my favourite hobby on wikis. I made many blogs on One Piece wiki in which more than 80% were totally random ^_^ but people loves them cause of the humour and randomness. So when I moved to Fairy Tail wiki, I decided to carry my legacy of randomness here as well.. and surprising as this may sound ^_^ I fit in. This wiki is random and full of idiots just like me ^_^

Fairy Tail Wiki: Should I be offended for being called random or feel happy?

Monkey.D.Me: FEEL THE TASTE OF YOUR OWN MEDININE B!TCH!

Fairy Tail Wiki: Do you consider yourself a good blogger?

Monkey.D.Me: Another trick question >_> Well.. yes and no. Yes, cause I have made a successful career in blogging at both One Piece Wiki as well as Fairy Tail wiki. I don’t like to brag but I have made 137 blogs in total FT and Op wiki combined. Out of which 37 have comments over 100. I make humour blogs which entertains everyone and sometime make some discussion blogs which later also turns into party. Thus, my goal of making sure that everyone had fun gets achieved. BUT ..

No, cause my blogs are not exactly the ideal type of blogs that should be posted on wikis. Blogs are about educational discussion and exchange of opinions in professional manner. Blogs are to express your part or to notify the community of any important information. My blogs do none of this ( _ _) So in conclusion .. do I consider myself a good blogger? .. Well.. its Complicated ^_^

Fairy Tail Wiki: Why are you so obsessed with women?

Monkey.D.Me: Obsessed? What? Hahahaha (hiding all his 18+ treasures) where did you get such wrong idea from? Hahahaha (Signals his minions to burn all lingerie stolen from various female member’s houses) You got the wrong man ^_^ I am 100% innocent ..

Fairy Tail Wiki: (ಠ_ಠ)

Monkey.D.Me: okay ( _ _) I am obsessed. But .. There is SO MUCH TO LOVE ABOUT THEM! Women are kind, loving, beautiful and finest among god’s creations ^_^ They make the wheels of mankind spin. They support the credit card industry with their shopping Speers. They sing, they dance, they turn off the lights ;) How can a Man refuse to acknowledge such wonder?

Fairy Tail Wiki: Then, How about men?

Monkey.D.Me: What are those? (picking nose)

Fairy Tail Wiki: Do you have a particular type of woman?

Monkey.D.Me: Hmmmm.. sure, A combination of Erza from FT and Robin from OP. Erza’s Scarlet hair, Robin’s curvy body and C-Cups, Erza’s Cheerfulness and naughtiness, Robin’s smarts and sense of fashion. They both are ideal women that everyman wants to date ^_^ so since I can’t make choice between two.. WHY CAN’T I HAVE BOTH?!

Fairy Tail Wiki: Have you ever considered combining your love for women and blogging by making erotic blogs?

Monkey.D.Me: Hmmm nice question, I give you that.. well, mainly I am worried about the community’s reaction to such creations. Most of the members on FT wiki are bellow age of 16 so erotic blogs are not suitable in their developing years >_> but then again, I seen few girls who are in high school reading 50 Shades of Gray .. that book is not exactly teen friendly >_> .. but since you have mentioned .. let me give it a try .. EROTIC BLOG.. Here goes for nothing ( _ _)

(MDM enters the stage wearing leather jeans and unbuttoned Tango shirt)

Hello Ladies and Gentlemen

Welcome to MDM’s Exotic Talk Show, here we invite and “feel” the discussion with our best female society members. Today’s talk topic is “Lack of Erotic Moments in Fairy Tail”. Please welcome our guests Niji Shakura and JessILU.

(Following is blog author narration of the two women just walking in.)

My heart was beating hard cause of nervousness. Encountering such beautiful women at once was making my body feel heavily and uncomfortable. I was sweating but my body was frozen that wouldn't move to my will. I wanted to drink water to calm my nervousness but before I get a chance, the show lights were on and Niji Shakura and JessIlu walked in on the stage. Niji Shakura, also known as Niji was a pretty girl in her 20s known her sexy appeal. Her eyes were sharp and seductive to a level that I felt it was undressing me standing. She was wearing short dress with revealing top where most of my focus got targeted. Later when I forced my focus out of there, it was locked on the beautiful legs of other angel standing before me, JessIlu. Also known as Jess and considered the Sweetheart of the Wikia, she was beautiful women wearing a dress. I didn’t realize when did my body moved on its own and received kiss on cheeks from these two women and returned to its frozen position from before. The feelings that i felt at the end of this little reward was slight tingle between my legs. They both sat on the guest seats and Jessilu crossed her feets revealing her beautiful legs which forced the words out of my mouth “You have beautiful legs”.

I was afraid if I sounded weird but she smiled and adjusted her feet running her hands down her smooth legs slowly up from her toes to her ankles and purred like a kitten-

(MDM realizes that FT Wiki has already grabbed lotion and tissues)

TEH FUCK YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!?

Fairy Tail Wiki: Ah, Oops .. sorry, >_> that was quite a .. “creative” writing .. um, .. moving on ..

Monkey.D.Me: =_= one question.. are you He? She? Or Chaos?

Fairy Tail Wiki: I bet your family owns a gas station. ಠ◡ಠ

Monkey.D.Me: No no no, my Family owns couple KFC where we make the finest fried chicken and waffles. Jerk chicken is our speciality. My brother owns a branded shoe shop where he sells top company Athletic shoes and T-shirts like Adidas and Nike. We take back the shoes even if the customer brings them back after using them for one month. Also, I own a wholesale warehouse full of grape juice =_=

Rai: .. MARRY ME YOU WHORE!!

Monkey.D.Me: lol I lied, I just own a Convenience Store (ಠ⌣ಠ)

Rai: .. ಠ_ಠ .. (Shoplifts and runs away) Trolololol

Monkey.D.Me: (Runs after him) GET YOU BLACK ASS BACK HERE (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ

Well, that's all folks! I wish I could say more, but I'm a little preoccupied with running at the moment. Next month I'll be interviewing with a new user on our site who has to be the most arrogant, annoying, BLASPHEMOUS, son of a bitch I have ever met. Look forward to it!!