Template:TMITM/Apr2012

 

Ready for four new fresh chapters to be reviewed, guys? Then let us not waste any time, let's get going!

Signature tune!

I - Chapter 277: Stockings
Following the cover page summing up the results so far, commented by the two obnoxious adorable Exceeds Lector and Frosch, we're immediately thrown in the infirmary, where Natsu and Wendy are resting, looked after by Porlyusica, Charle and Lucy. The latter leaves without the fortune-telling Exceed telling her anything about her vision, considering it a mere dream. Seriously Charle, you're useful as an asshole on the elbow. Let's just move on...

Readying to face off in the sandy arena are Kurohebi, Raven Tail's 2nd place from the last contest, and Toby, that lion/dog/something fellow from Lyon's team (referred as an hound throughout the chapter... Who would have guessed that...). You know, "Ooooon!". Before confrontation ensues, Lucy glances at Raven Tail, with Flare teasingly staring back... Covered in bruises. What happened? We soon discover when the so-called Armor Guy (unofficial name of course, you might as well refer to him as Mazinger, Grendizer or Ronald) starts brutalizing her for her pathetic figure in her fight with Lucy. Flare tries holding her tears back and begs as her pimp fellow teammate bitch-slaps punishes her. Well, what to say. We might be talking about chivalry, respect for women, comraderie... This guys seems to lack all of such concepts. Unless hiding under the armor we have... A girl! Could you guess that? It would be kind of weird... Besides, being a Mashima's Angel, shouldn't she have an humongous chest, preventing her from wearing that tight-fitting cuirass? Or, maybe... Maybe she's completely flat (just like a minority of other characters), and thus enjoyins picking on her buxom teammate out of envy...!

... Though I'm still quite sure that behind that armor must be the Vanish Brothers. Both of them. Hell yeah.

Returning to the chapter, the fight starts. Toby extends his nails and goes to the offensive, trying to slash Kurohebi, presumably employing an enhanced version of his paralyzing substance... Maaaan, you really improved over those 7 years, didn't you? The other evades all blows and then disappears in sand... Only to reapper striking Toby, revealing his Mimic Magic, which he used to copy Max Alors' Sand Magic, much to the latter's dismay. What's the matter, Max? When did he copy it from you? Were you waving your butt around at people again? Toby, informed that "Kurohebi" isn't his opponent's real name, makes a bet with him: if he was to win, Raven Tail's Mage will tel him his real name; if, on the other hand, Kurohebi emerged victorious, Toby will tell him his so-called "super secret". Willing to learn what secret a doggish dude could have (bones buried in the garden? An hot female doggy living nearby? A long-lasting friendship with Reginald?), Kurohebi owns Toby and demands his "reward". Toby, with tears in his eyes, goes on to reveal his secret... The lack of a sock, which he hasn't been able to find even searching for three months. Toby's guildmates cry as well, just as Kurohebi points the missing piece of clothing's position, the own chest of the Lamia Scale's Mage, to Toby, much to his and Erza's delight. Seriously, there's something wrong here... Toby acnowledges Kurohebi as a good guy just as the Raven Tail nears him and extends one hand... Are the winner and the defeated going to shake hands? Does Raven Tail have honorable members? Does Pippa know her nickname is informal Italian for "masturbation"? All these questions fill our mind, as Kurohebi's hand reaches for Toby's sock and TEARS IT TO PIECES BEFORE HIS OWN EYES! Toby despairs, his guildmates stare in anger and Erza has to be held down by Gray as a satisfied Kurohebi leaves the arena, his fellow guildmates laughing their asses off at his evil deed. What to say... WE'RE ALL WITH YOU, TOBY! DON'T WORRY, WE'LL GET YOU ANOTHER PAIR OF SOCKS!

As we're left to wonder whether none felt like asking Toby why was he wearing a single sock and had the other hanging from his neck in three entire months, the next battle is announced... As requested by the King himself, who here makes an obscured appearance (partially due to him being tall as a jar), the next fight has Quatro Cerberus' Bacchus pitted against... Fairy Tail's Elfman! The King complains about his trusty Arcadios (you know, that square-nosed fanboy of Zeref) having organized the wrong match, with Elfman fighting in Erza's place; something unimagninable, given the King's perfectly clear instructions (the last part was supposed to be sarcastic, just so you know). As everyone worries or rejoices at the thought of the Take Over Mage being pitted against a powerful fellow such as Bacchus, Quatro Cerberus' eternal drunkard proposes a bet to Elfman, like Toby did with Kurohebi: his victory will grant him a night with both of Elfman's sisters, Mirajane and Lisanna, at the same time. Bacchus loses a fair share of his fanboys/fangirls, more attached to the two girls, as Elfman states he'll crush him for saying such a thing. The two ready for battle. The chapter ends with Natsu waking up alone in the infirmary, and noticing a smell he doesn't know drifted through the air. Wonder what that could be...

The chapter, living up to Mashima's standards in terms of art, didn't have colored or double pages, but made up for this lack with an incredibly funny and yet dramatic scene: Toby's "secret" and Kurohebi's reaction were surely worth reading, and the whole matter, the chapter's namesake, came as something original and unexpected.

II - Chapter 278: Elfman vs Bacchus
The chapter starts with Natsu leaving the infirmary, following after that unfamiliar smell he had perceived, and running across some weird fellows, carrying on their backs the unconscious guildmates who were previously by his side. Natsu runs after them, powing one who, having lost the way to one of Sergio Leone's sets (much like Alzack and Bisca, to tell it all... They managed to bear a child during such time which had them lost... The director, known for his bad temper, must be enraged... If he wasn't dead, that is. R.I.P.!) tries attacking him with double revolvers, and soon taking the others, who were seemingly after a single girl, from behind. Noooope, not in that sense...

Meanwhile, the battle has started, and there don't appear to be many surprises... Elfman is powerless before Bacchus, being unable to land blows on him. Beast Arm, however, doesn't give up, and continues assaulting the opponent with... A new complete Take Over, granting him enhanced speed and the evocative name of Weretiger (after werewolves and werecars, that had to be the next to come...)! Elfman, that's great! It's awesome that you mastered new transformations! Overusing steroids wasn't the only thing you did in those three months, uh? Nice, really nice! We're proud of you! Look at you, assaulting your foe in your spotted fur, you're so massive and mighty... Especially as your hits miss and Bacchus slams you to the floor. Poor thing. Guess cool transformations aren't enough to stand up to someone at Erza's level, if not higher...

As Elfman has his ass beaten by the most notorious drunkard around, Erza goes on to explain the above-mentioned drunkard's abilities: his basic form of Magic, focusing Magic Power in the palms of his hand, perfectly complements his fighting style based on palm strikes, which receives further improving when he drinks alcohol... Something Quatro Cerberus' S-Class resolves to do when Elfman chooses the wager for their bet, the one he'd obtain in case of victory: Quatro Cerberus' name would be Quatro Puppy for the rest of the Games. Readers sigh with relief as someone's twisted fantasies about Elfman raping Bacchus come to an end, and as Bacchus himself goes on to land blows on Elfman at super-human speed... Only to find his hands covered in bruises. The Take Over Mage stands tall, his Lizardman complete transformation activated, and his muscular mass covered in sharp spikes. Much to the crowd's dismay, battle goes on, with both the excited fighters willing to see which will break first, Bacchus' hands or Elfman's body.

After a hail of blows from Bacchus' side, both fighters are shown to be exhausted. Elfman falls on his knees before Bacchus, who stands proud and tall... Seconds before collpasing to the ground, satisfied after a good fight, acknowledging his opponents as a real man... While presumably preparing to spend a night alone after his two sexual preys escaped his hands. Elfman is declared the winner, gaining 10 points for Fairy Tail, with all of his guildmates cheering him up, as Quatro Puppy stare in disbelief.

Meanwhile, the guys who kidnapped Wendy, Porlyusica and Charle are taken under custody, revealing to have been sent by Raven Tail and that their target wasn't Wendy, but the girl who was in the infirmary... Lucy. Well, that makes more sense. Who would kidnap a young, cute and innocent young girl rather than a buxom, fanservice-clad blonde? Say, who?! Elsewhere, the real schemers of the kidnapping are revealed... Can you guess who? But of course, the square-nosed fellow! Leading a group of similarly corrupt underlings, and willing to take advantage of the discord between Fairy Tail and Raven Tail, blaming the latter ones for the crime, Arcadios readies to kidnap the "Celestial Spirit Mage" for the sake of "Plan Eclipse". Mhm... I think I've heard of something like that before. (NARUTO SPOILER ALERT!!!)

Well, this surprising chapter came with 28 pages, 3 of which were colored, with two more pages containing information regarding the incoming Fairy Tail movie. I could never have imagined the outcome... Though at least Elfman won through logic, instead of the usual nakama crap. His new complete Take Over forms were also an extremely nice surprise, given their special skills. Bacchus, on the other hand, was quite a disappointment... I'd expected him to showcase that very same monstrous strength he sported some chapters ago... Oh well. Hope the guy gets to shine sooner or later.

III - Chapter 279: The Door Hidden in the Darkness
Another long chapter starts with the crew assembled in the infirmary, staying at the injured Elfman's bedside, praising the Mage who's going to be off for a while, with Wendy taking her place back. After they leave the place, with the Raijinshu remaining behind to protect the infirmary (something useful, given the fact that the kidnappers' target is no longer there...), they go on to wonder why, if Raven Tail is the one behind the kidnapping attempt (and we know that, strangely enough, it isn't), it didn't have Obra (the long-nosed fellow who dispelled Lucy's Urano Metria and thus became the public enemy of many fans) take part in it. Kind of smart of them... Guess someone in the backstage showed them the script. The very same script which has Charle still remain silent, not uttering a single word about Lucy's incoming fate... Great, really. You're as useless as a traffic light in GTA.

As our heroes hang around, the third match of the second days is starting... Fairy Tail's Mirajane vs Jenny Realight, Blue Pegasus' reserve member, replacing Ichiya, who was downed by the Chariot event... Alright, now I NEED to see a testament of power on the side of "Pegasus' strongest Mage"... Do something, Ichiya! While some poeple mourn his absence, the battle takes place... With both girls employing Transformation to show off their bodies in more and more revealing swimsuits and similar attires, much to the joy of the public and of horny readers, one in particular. With the two blocked in a standoff, Jenny proposes a bet: the losing girl will have to pose for the Weekly Sorcerer... Nude. What?! Seriously?! Mira would never accept something like th...



Oh.

Well, guess that's good for us boys... Mirajane's most untiring fan must be eager for his Muse to lose now...

Jenny silently exposes her plan, which involves more people wanting to see Mirajane naked due to a variety of reasons, before pulling out her so-called "battle form", sure of her victory. Mirajane claims that she wants to turn the "clash of beauty" into a "clash of strength" as she activates Sitri, described by Erza as her strongest Satan Soul form, which comes with weird armor and a sea of flames on her feet, useful for firewalking or cooking beefs while standing on the grill itself... As well as to own cocky girls in a single hit, gaining 10 points for your team and making them cry at the thought of appearing nude in a photo which thousands of horny heart-eyed guys will idolize.

As rescuers try to bring back to consciousness Rai, who's spilling hectoliters of blood from his nose after seeing the new Take Over of his darling, a shadowy meeting's taking place elsewhere: confronting Arcadios about the attempted kidnapping of Lucy is Fiore's Minister of Defense... Perfectly aware of the whole matter, though not too fond of it. Arcadios says "that", something supposed to be used for Fiore's good, has already been completed, having taken "just" seven years, and shows the gigantic, complex portal hidden in the shadows, the chapter's namesake and the object behind Plan Eclipse... Which will require Lucy's life to work. Ton-ton toooooon!

Here finishes another well-drawn chapter with 28 pages, three of which colored, with two double ones. Most of it was focused on fanservice... Nothing new I guess. All in all, an enjoyable chapter, making us eager to see what such famous Plan Eclipse' (which, like this, seems to have distinguished itself from its Naruto counterpart) is about, and whether Lucy will fall prey to it.

IV - Chapter 280: Kagura vs Yukino
And here comes another chapter! Following an endless number of fan-made colorings completely fucking the pages' count up, we get to see Fairy Tail's Team B rejoicing in Mira's victory. The next match, the last one for the second day, is then announced: Yukino Aguria (Angel's twin sister from Sabertooth, possessing a less pugnacious disposition, a fancier attire and smaller... Ahem.) vs Kagura Mikazuchi (the "Hot Mermaid Heel Girl" said to be the strongest member of her guild). The audience cheers for another "battle of beauties" as Sabertooth promises its seemingly new recruit that her loss would lead to torture and to the Wiki's chat while it's crowded (virtually to the same thing, then) wouldn't be good, and Kagura, excited after seeing Tom Cruise in his tight armor in The Last Samurai, enters the arena wielding a katana she found somewhere and spitting samurai nonsense. The crowd gets silent as the match meets its start... And another bet is made. Unwilling to bet trivial things, the two women choose a single wager: their lives. Hell, someone really took this matter seriously...

Pleased with the bet, Yukino pulls out a key. Don't tell me...?! Nope, that's exactly what I'm telling, as the Celestial Spirit Mage Yukino Aguria summons forth Pisces, one of the Golden Keys we'de been waiting for for so long, and orders the two large beings composing it to attack Kagura, something they try to do with headbutts.... Without success, due to Kagura jumping around. "Sigh" In any case, even if they had connected, there's no way that might have been better than THIS, guess we all know that. The audience has no time to think about such past matters, however, as Yukino pulls out another key, summoning forth Libra, the other Golden Key we'd been waiting for... The circle's closed, all the Zodiac Keys have been revealed! Hurray! To celebrate, Libra proceeds to alter the weight of the opponent, in order for Pisces to strike her, employing the same Magic as that fatass from Mermaid Heel itself... And the same as Kagura, it seems, considering how easily she dispels it and ducks, being noted as Risley's teacher.

Annoyed, Yukino displays one more key, the 13th surpassing the 12 Golden ones, which Lucy seems to have heard about. On the sandy field is summoned Ophiuchus, the "Snake Charmer", the Paradise of B Movies: a gigantic reptile partially composed of meat, and partially mechanical in nature. Hell. Such an humoungous, feared creature will surely take down the sword-wielding opponent, right? Naaah, that would be too banal. It's way better to fall in an instant before the blade which Kagura doesn't even bother unsheathing. SAY WHAT?! Style of the Undrawn Long Sword? Archenemy, the Blade of Resentment, which, if unsheathed, would cause a cataclysm?! FREE WAFFLES?! In any case, the reptile is reduced to a pile of gears in a pair of panels, just as Kagura nears its summoner and defeats her with a single blow, her sword still sheathed.

The astonished crowd is left to wonder about Kagura's strength as Yukino cries over her defeat and Sabertooth's lack of points for the second day, something which seems to get on Sting's nerves as well. As she leaves, Kagura states her possession of Yukino's life, something which the other tearfully confirms. As Rem is left to wonder what weird M&S practices such relationship will entail, Arcadios rejoices in the fact that the Celestial Spirit Mages taking part in the Games are two. Jella is puzzled, with the familiar "dark energy" he'd be looking for still not visible. We're then shown a calendar marking the five days to the "fated one"... 7 July X791.

This chapter, coming without colors but sporting a 2-pages panel portraying Kagura beating the crap out of Yukino, showed us a fair amount of awesome things... Problem is we got absolutely no time to enjoy them. Two Spirits Celestial Spirits freaks like you guys people have been looking forward to seeing for ages dealt with in a pair of pages, and a 13th, "super strong" mechanical beast having TWO PANELS to show off WITHOUT PERFORMING A SINGLE ATTACK before being slashed to pieces. Hell yeah. The art was good, and Mashima, despite not finding enough time to show us the longed-for Spirits for more than a bunch of seconds, had enough of it to draw a series of pantyshots of the deadly-serious Kagura... Just as everyone start to wonder whether she's wearing tights, pantyhose, skin-tight pants, or simply has overly hairy lower limbs. Guess time will tell.